General Forum

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If its boringggggg, why did you read it again? :P Why dont you post a joke so we can all comment on it? :)

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Some of us haven't read every single post in the CC forum for the past year so we didn't see the joke the first time. It was funny.

why didn't the three men just each strap on a parachute and the strongest of them jump out while holding the little boy?

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Ever got to stage 5? :)

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haha i think all hosts on cc are permanent stage 2 drunk, and some of them sometimes reach stage 3 LOL

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Maybe unconsciousness? :D

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I see no reason why the girl next door can't be a porn diva

Dude, we need to talk♥You are too damn cute

the outfit in your newest pics would suit me just fine .

A nice sundress, plain and simple :)

i liked the outfit from pics a while ago with leather and chains . . . mmmmmmmmmm

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only with you in my fantasies

Uhm.erm, nvm:P

hmm i think it is better to change , from time to time..u can wearing ur clothes the way you are feeling more comfortable for today.for example i dont like to sit on video in this lace lingerie etc,,,,its not comfortable for me.i like to work in my normal everyday clothes.skirts, shirts, dresses,and nobody complained so far :P . anyway its will fall down on the floor sooner or later :)) but if someone would ask me to wear some spesial lingerie i will.. i think it is a bit not natural to sit here everyday in lingerie ,heels,corserts,, espesialy in little shy.. would make me feel like porn star :)) etc..well also depends who are your fans:P if they like to chat or wank or whatever :PP kiss bb. in any case the style u have is fit u. and u look very sexy in ur tight dresses :)

What to wear is better left to Anita and Cassie. Both have rockin bodies and would look good in an old pair of overalls. Both are leaders and have much better judgement than any of us retarded old perverts.

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and sweet wankers :)))

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now days not many asking me about that:)) im getting old and boring:))

Yep, sure... old and boring. Better to vacate CC temporarily and come over for a refreshing visit. Bring Anita as well... :P

I assume you are a host. A straightforward question, therefore, which I hope to be answered without any obfuscation: why do you think higher priced hosts are providing a better quality show than their lower priced counterparts, and what gives your views credibility?

There are no facts that I am aware of that paying a higher price per minute gets you a better show....

You said it all my brother

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From my experience some higher priced hosts just work at other sites at one and the same time. So there is no reason to tell that you can get a higher quality because of higher price. I was at vids of very good quality at all possible prices

"there are lots of girls who charge between 50 cents and 1 buck and still dont get any video for hours"

"and some others who charge closeto 2$ and more are busy all the time"

These are not assumptions, it's true. And it has nothing to do with hosts working on other sites, at the same time or not. They are simply wonderful hosts, charging a decent price per minute ( yes, 2$ is decent in my book, even I wouldn't do this type of work for any price ) and providing a great service which is highly appreciated.

i never complain if price is 2.49 or less, it is fair price from good show.
i would complain only if price is 3.00 or more, if the show is not really great for the price. (i would not complain even then, i just give a rating that will tell what i think about the show)

I dont think viewers complain about prices around 2.49, complaining is more about these ridiciluos prices like 6.00

some people like themselves so much that cant allow to buy something cheap, clever hosts use it. ;p

My experience has been that a lower-priced host can, and often does, provide just as good a quality of show as some of the higher priced hosts.

I suppose, however, that one reason for some hosts charging a higher price is because they can . . . in other words, their shows are consistently high quality and they have become popular. Stands to reason that the more popular a host is, the more she would charge -- at least as far as the law of supply and demand goes.

That said, recently I have checked out some of the very popular hosts here and discovered that some of them, surprisingly, charge well under $2/minute (I'll let you discover them for yourself, but their pictures often greet us as we log on <hint hint>)

But price is no guarantee of a great show. I've been disappointed by some of the popular hosts, and wondered why they were popular. Maybe I got the impression that I was doing them a favor by coming to their video chat rather than paying them for a service. Maybe I felt like there was no "connection" between me and the host. Or maybe I just had the feeling that the host was thinking, "Why are you here? Stop wasting my time." Some of them just seemed to me like limp rags going through the motions without any feeling, excitement, or enthusiasm. Of course, it could have been a bad day. And of course, the same criticisms could be true of a low-priced host.

So what do I look for?
1. Someone I can feel a "connection" with. I can't explain it, just that I know if we are "connecting", rather than every thought feeling like a strained, "what do I do next?"
2. Someone who shows excitement, really feels what they are doing when involved in the sexual part of the show.
3. Someone who seems genuinely interested in me as a person, not just as a dollar bill, and who is able to engage me in lively conversation. Again, it is hard to define exactly what I mean, but I can tell the difference between someone who is genuinely interested, and someone who doesn't have the time of day, or who is not a good conversationalist. (And yes, I look for more than just sex in videochat, sometimes I never even get around to the adult portion of it all, if the conversation is good enough and stimulating enough)

It is absurd to complain about cam girl prices here or any other site. No one is being forced to go to any cam site much less spend money on it. If you are a guy that spends too much on cam sites, look in the mirror and you will see your problem face to face. Stop blaming cam girls and cam sites and accept responsibility for the money you spend!

Such wise words!!! I agree :) If i go to the store and see that smth is too expensive me, i just don't buy it or i buy it but then i blame myself and not the store that sells it

i go to a store and see they are charging $1.50 for a product. Go to another store and see they are charging $2.50 for the same product. You think i won't complain to the manager? Yes I will complain, AndI will let others know of the price difference as well. Then I will go buy my product at the $1.50 store.

Did you mis-read my post? or were you replying to the thread in general?

mostly i complain about prices,so it seems i'm just poor loser,not member who doesn't know how to express himself,or have fun with open minded hosts.damn i miss imnotsoshy ((( :--)

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I had chicken for dinner tonight.
It was pretty good.

If people didn't complain then prices would be too low. They reach a nice balance

LOL people will complain no matter what. It is human nature to complain. There will always be some who are never satisfied -- even if a host charges $.15/ minute, someone would complain about it, I'm sure. Maybe the complaint will be "Your price is too low, can you raise it by about 85 cents?" LOL

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Yes, it's much improved since our day when we relied on what the butler saw machines at the seaside

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no new name , just a new life that she is very happy in .

just look around and you will find her, not gone

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new name-yes she is around dude

I know exactly where to find her... ;)

i would hope you do pete , and to the rest there is no new name for pammy .

you dude's keeping thinking that--and pam -your secret is with me--love you always

thanks sweetheart

and because they'll never forgive you for stealing their woman, here they are trying stir up trouble)))))))))))))))))

you're supposed to be gone too

hes like a bad case of gas , never totally gone .

wonder if that russian girl knows he's still around here

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How can u have "a few viewers" watching while in Private??

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Well Private = 121 (on Camcontacts at least) yet i apologise if i sounded rude or unkind, i didn't mean to

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lol Well girls I hope you all manage to get your ideal video. Just make sure there is something good on the tv :D

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If It's the UK version then you certainly beat Glamour with her dog whisperer :P

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Dream ;-))))

A perfect vacation for me is a 5 star resort in Tahiti but I am not going to do that either...ever. For me 15 minutes is normally my time...sometimes more...sometimes less...it depends more on mother nature, the host and the plumbing to see how long it really lasts.

for me its a pleasant time with someone whom i like and who care about me.not matter how long

I really don't see the point of paying just to see a camgirl naked,porn is free everywhere.What you as a camgirl can offer is 1on1 interaction and possible chance to meet in real,otherwise why bother.

and who know maybe it will bring somewhere and u will marry one day :)

Lets get the sex out of the way first ; )

nice original post - i wondered how some hosts could get even more lazy. are you from tver, perhaps?

Sure does sound like you're dreaming anyway

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I think I have done that before, and sadly I am still paying for it on my credit card.

check out PrideAndJoy a lady who should be miss univerce with that winning smile!

ok i did. not in my taste:)) crystal still ROCK!!

Hmm yeah she got a great body but i would still prefer yours over hers any day ;)

>:)

AnitaBella yummy

without doubts mmmm :P

AnitaBella...yummy , Casablanka...yummy , together ....omfg

Keep dreaming, you would never be able to afford that....

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I'd have to disagree. The two most perfect bodies I have ever seen in my life belong to Playfullrach and Luckystar13. Nothing fake, nothing enhanced, just pure perfection.

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you forgot me:P:P:P:

For perfect body check out Karinxlovers aka Veryme. Amazing body...if you like them bikini, fitness model perfect. Great english skills and very very sexy. To me...it is the biggest OMG on CC.

I prefer nude to bikinis

too skinny..

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My dear Cassie, I've seen both you and VIP in pvt and she is not even close to you in beauty and charm.

:P thx cassie fan, but im sure she is ;))

My dear Lexa, nobody comes close to your beauty....in my eyes. You have the most perfect form, beautiful curves and such sublime proportions.

Still, it is nice of you comment on others too, of course.... I just prefer you ;)

Kisses, all over your perfect form,
T xxx

thank u , peu petit tigre:P (K)

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Nice to know. Also interesting to know that Santa Claus shaves his balls.

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why someone cant have their 1-3 favourits, and cant say about that?

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just jealous because no one kisses yours?

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we know that isn't imshy))))))))))))

My Oscar goes to xxhottouchxx. So hot!

Inblossom rocks! dont like bones and skin but she has something beside appearance - MAGIC and OMG such an adorable face..
Luv Xenia

nothing as nice as a shaven pussy. why wud u want to hide such a beaitifull thing with hair

i disagree. I think nature's adornment is beautiful.

Has anyone ever stopped to think just why that hair is there in the first place?

Some possible reasons come to mind:
1. cushion and padding for the sexual act
2. it's triangular shape "points the way"
3. it acts as a strainer when eating soup. (oh wait, that's the mustache.)
4. the human body originally came with an instruction manual: "To make babies, connect the two parts marked by V." (Well, why not? How else would you expect the first two people, who had never experienced sex or baby-making before, to know how to do it? Obviously, since they were "created" not "born" they had never walked in on Mom and Dad and seen how to do it. And of course, we all know it was the woman who read the instructions. The man just said, "oh I can figure this out by myself. I think this part goes here..." Thus anal sex was born. The other failed attempt gave man the idea for dental floss.)

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I love all types but I really get off watching a good hairy one being shaved. Any offers?

Hair looks disgusting there. Shaved bald is the only option.

Pussy is overrated. The ass is where it's happening.

ok then..shaved or hairy ass..what do U prefer? :-)

Shaved looks and feels horrible. I prefer a lil hair

I agree.

Hairy pussy. Only reason is makes me horny to see

Hairy pussy, looks Great & is natural.

Do you like natural hairy arm pits too?

Not as much, but a hairy pussy can be beautiful.

Also, if you can weave braids with them?

Armpits have no effect on me

Lol
Now i want to have pussys, one is shaved, the other hairy...:)

Long haired pussy- Tabby is good, but ginger or tortoieshell is also good

an open one

Neither, waxed is better :P

what are you bb? Mail me if you prefer not to say here.

xxx

loool you are always the wanderer aren't you pinprick looool...

i won't visit a host at all if she has a hairy pussy

It doesn't need to be shave completely bald. Trimmed with a small landing strip is nice. Bushy hairy is awful.

Neat and trimmed, nothing better than a beautiful landing strip to lead the way :P

Yes - bald or trimmed is good - anything but not hairy..Hairy is nasty.

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in one minute i can see if your face, body, and attitude are worth the price that you charge.
and why u see my post so negative, it was a clear reply to previous post about "members have no reason to complain about prices" LOL

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If you are not happy with a host's price, don't join her. Why would you give a bad rating for something you agreed with, by default.
Also, could you describe the one minute show you were talking about?
In such a short time, you can only decide if you're getting a good video feed or not.

ROFLMAO

You see the price when you click on the video chat!!! ITS NOT A REASON TO GIVE BAD RATING!

yes i see the price... for example i see price 3.49 so i think she must be really great host, i enter the video, and if in 1 minute she not naked and make me in great mood, i end the video and rate her based on was she worth for 3.49 or not... i dont complain about price, i only complain if host is not worth the price ;-)

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naked.. in one minute.. get a life dude, seriously! ;)

You just cant see the irony.. viewers should not complain about price (as previous post) so ofcourse hosts also should not complain about bad ratings, just move on and get a life, lets all stop complaining ))

And for getting naked in one minute, almost every professional hosts who i visit get naked in one minute, and after this they ask how i want them to continue, this is what i call a professional host and if i also like what she looks like, i have no problems to stay 15 - 20 minutes with 3.49 price, and give good rating without complaining about price... and if price is about 1.49 i dont mind spending little more to wait her getting naked, and even if i dont like her show too much, i still wont give bad ratings because her price is fair for her show.

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what part of my argue is invalid?
I dont say that you must do what i want you to do in show, as an individual person you are free to do what you like.
But i am also an individual person, and if i think your show dont equal your price, i am free to give you a bad rating, and you should not complain about that.

It is invalid argument if you say that no host can get naked in one minute, because many of them do to make viewer happy.

If you go to hairdresser and ask her to colour you hair brown, you dont expect her to colour it green just because that day she was in mood to use green colour

if you don't get it... you just don't. i'm out

Dear 'selective viewer', why don't you post under your REAL screenname, therefore all the girls will know who you are and what you want, and, they can also choose not to video with you if they don't feel compatible with you and your expectations.

dear host, why dont you post your real screenname, so i would never enter your chat by mistake

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Lesson: Don't suck so fast.

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Why does it take 3 women with PMS to screw in a lightbulb?

IT JUST DOES, OKAY?!!!!!!

And when a man has PMS it refers to:

Post Masturbation Syndrome

Seems like a non sequitur to me.

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Most password protected sessions I've seen have both open and 121 option. But I do believe it can be configured to be at a 121 price if the host wants it to be.

Yes it can be a 121 show at open price but it can be something else too.

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I agree with you also. But I had 2 hosts in mind from NSS when I posted this, but do not want to mention names. But I am convinced in these 2 cases, that they are using password protected sessions to get a 121 price on all pvts and also to screen their prospective viewers to better insure a 5 star rating.

You presumably have some specific reasons for suspecting these two hosts. In my experience as a very long term member a common reason for a password session in hardcore is that the member just wants to chat and does not require a show or for some reason the host does not want/is not able to give a show at that time but can chat to the member.

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I'm sure your reason, along with a few others, will have been posted in all those previous posts on the subject. Which really makes you wonder why he has to ask the question.

password shows can be used by all hosts in all categories. it can be for any reason, it can be for less money, more money, free, but it is up to the member to decide if he wants to go in, because unless the hosts posts the password for all to see, u have to cc mail her. to get it.

password shows allow a host to do other things besides sit in front of the pc. plus it cuts down on having to deal with members in free chat who are rude or just not nice ....it gives a host a chance to get ready for the show in case it is a request for a certain type of show and she has to change etc. it eliminates members complaining that they enter a video and host is not sitting at the pc...there are many reasons for password sessions...and there are a number of repeat members who like the password because of the benefit. and with password the member chooses if he is going to do open session or one to one. only difference is that if open anyone can enter the session who know the password.

i think it is a good way to record what is asked for and what is agreed to be done before video...then there is not question about who said what because both member and host have copy of the mails regarding the session.

You sound like a softcore host and everything you say makes perfect sense. But it can also be misused and I suspect that is the case in 2 hardcore hosts I have seen using it. If you read my original post, it was not a complaint against softcore hosts using it, but by seeing it used in hardcore to circumvent the cc rule against requiring 121 by a hardcore host for a nude show.

nooo I read your post,

First. all hosts are allowed to use password sessions, does not matter the category, there are members that say if a member want to be with a hardcore host then he should go one to one, well password is like doing one to one only it can be at a different price. I have been in both hardcore and softcore and even in hardcore category I have used password for prearranged sessions, as well as for giving lower price to regulars. as well as some members asked for it and they could do it for open price. i also had a select few members who liked the same type of show, did not mind sharing but did did not want to have anyone coming in saying things like, "show me your cunt bitch" or "fuck your ass for me"...so that group of members would all show up at the same time which was prearranged and have password, they would all sit in the video and all would talk laugh and enjoy the show, but there was not crudeness, they knew the show that was going to be and that is what they wanted..

I am sure like anything else in this world there are going to be those who abuse something and ruin it for others. but not all hosts who use passwords do it to screw with the rules. that is all i was i was saying... and btw you gave the impression that you were complaining and you gave the impression that you do not think that password should be used in the hardcore category.

In my opinion, there should not be password protected sessions in hardcore categories. I have no such issues with softcore. If a hardcore host wants to do a password protected session, she can easily switch to softcore.

Sure..i got some helpfull friends in Nigeria!!!

Nope, they transferred all their money into my bank account for safe keeping. At least that's what the spam email said.

Since I just won the Microsoft Lottery, yes I can!

Agreee...
there are some who come in the room and tell me "ah.. your price is too much for me" LOL find some one else cheapper... do not complain.. it turns off so much!!!

yessss if a member tell me that my prices is too big for him and asking for discount.he is not worth my time and i will block:))

Yeah, but really if you aren't worth the price you are charging, it might be nice of you to drop it just a bit :)
Good business too!

If the guy is polite and know how to ask about (i mean discount) yes, of course i can give it, but is he just complina and cry...he will get a place in my block list for sure!!!

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Yes i can see at once if the model is to high priced

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I ask for dicounts whenever I buy. So here, if I think the host is too high, I ask for a discount. Soem give, so no. If no, sometimes I leave, sometimes I see her anyway. But there is no problem with askings politely for a discount

Depends on where you do your shopping at. Respectable stores don't leave room for bargaining, you can't negotiate, while bazaars and marketplaces do.

I prefer the first, because I get quality for My money. There are different views on what a smart shopper is.

There is, of course nothing wrong with asking, as long as you do it nicely.

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Does your employer negotiate your pay with you every day when you turn up for work? No, didn't think so. We're not selling shoes here, this isn't the same as bartering for a price on a product, this is a SERVICE, and yes, sure you can barter for some services but please remember that the girls here do not get paid a per/hour wage that's guaranteed at the end of the week, I think your attitude is wrong considering that CamContacts has got some of the lowest prices on the internet, and you STILL want to bring down the price. Geez.

I thought it was impolite and frankly cheesy to ask for a price reduction. Then one day, a few years ago, a host spoke to me in Comm Chat and asked if I wanted to do a video. I told her I would love to but her price was too steep. She said...what do you want to pay. I suggested a price and she said yes. Logged off and changed her price for my session...then returned to her regular price once it was done. Since then if I see a host I really, really want to do a video with and she seems nice in text chat...I will bring up the subject. I do not ask every host I chat with to lower her price and I don't bother hosts whose prices are so high....even a 50% cut is above what I would want to pay.

Many hosts have asked....will you promise to do xx minutes? Or I will offer....lower your price to this and I promise I will do 15 or whatever minutes. It has worked out well for me.

I also had favorite hosts who were CC "friends" give me a break on the price....which was very nice. But generally they made it up in volume from me. It was nice to be able to spend 30 minutes in a video when I would normally only be able to afford a fraction of that. And...at the lower price I tended to overspend anyway...human nature...when something is on sale people tend to stock up on it if they need it or not or if they can afford it or not.

But then..we all need a constant supply of naked hot girls...right?

Very good informative post.

Especially the part about everyone needing a supply of naked girls :P

Drew Brees the best-if the saints had any defense they be still in

yes and I heard there are huge sales on Hermes and Birkin bags.
Btw, does anyone know where's the train station?

Guess you didn't see his two interceptions Saturday. Quarterback rating. 93.....Alex Smith 105. I think Brees was a little too happy about breaking the single season passing mark. Who cares about that kind of record????? not me.

hje sint even the best QB in his family , far from the best in the NFL .

Tom Brady is the best QB in the NFL

Jim McMahon is best Punky QB

and he is married to Gisele Bunda

and he hasnt won the super bowl since!

The best QB in the NFL is Aaron Rodgers although I will agree Drew Brees did break Dan the Man Marino record, so I guess that makes him the second best

breaking a guys record that never won a thing makes him second best ?

Drew Brees the best QB-also a first class man

Michael Vick the best

Johnny Unitas was the best ever!

Griese will never forgive you for that :))

Bob Griese was great but Johnny U is in a class by himself. Montana is 2nd.

I'd be happy with the 3 rings and Gisele

You'd WILL be happy with rings and NO giselle!

Fran Tarkenton the best

But what are all you guys going to say if Alex Smith is the last man standing?
I do like Eli however. Loved how he took down the Patriots in the Super Bowl.

durrr ... football!!!!
durrrrrrrr!!!!!

PEYTON MANNING!!!!!!! who do you think trained ELI???

Great. and another.

A lad falls asleep by the road after leaving the pub on Saturday night. Two lasses come along and see him asleep in his kilt.
One says: "I always wanted to know what they wear under their kilts".
So the other lifts it and sees nothing except for his manhood. They are both impressed.
The second lass says "Let's leave him a surprise." So she pulls a blue ribbon from her hair and ties it around his cock.

When the lad wakes up, he goes to pee, and sees the ribbon. He says "I don't know where you been, but I'm glad you won first prize!"

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everyone makes a big deal out of the kid's religion except him and of all the athletes that praise god after every play and point their fingers skyward, he is the least phony about it. you people need to grow up. btw the entire bronco team sucked not just him

it's a weird thing, isn't it? on one hand you have people who resent his piety, but on the other, you have his defenders who seem to love to make it an even bigger issue - something that obviously engenders an even a greater negativity toward his faith in some. i'm sure tebow himself doesn't at all welcome that.

bottom line - the guy's proven that he can make plays, now all he needs is just more experience and a little work on his throwing mechanics.

needs more work on throwing mechanics ?? lol...seems like after playing pop warner, high school, div 1 college, now a pro QB he'd know how to throw a football?? Geeez com on he got his ass kicked by awesome Pats team !!!! GO PATS now they have a real QB

tommy boy, you sound suspiciously like a follower of Bill Mahers tweeting

change the country and you could all be talking about Sir Cliff Richard

well his (Tebow) day will come--Tom Brady is getting old, maybe he (Brady) needs to start praying more

tebow is done , off to the glue factory he goes .

Is Tom Brady that gay dude on the Brady Bunch and was is a QB?

Joe Namath

I told you all the Giants would beat the Packers

Not if I was still QB

if you were still a QB hit by today's 350lb 4.3 speed D-Line you'd still be changing that drip bag !

None of these padded boneheads would last 5 minutes in a rugby union side.

Johnny Unitas, now there was a quaterback

and im sure none really care to

Joe Namath and Joe Montana -those 2 are special

I know because only real men play rugby.

If I had Brady's offensive line I would be in the Hall of Fame already. He has never seriously faced a pass rush. Has all day to throw. He is accurate no doubt, but his line is just unreal.

he did face a serous pass rush. the last time he played the giants in the super bowl. may happen to him again

You are right. I think the Ravens have gotten after him some in the last few years too.

Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that
sparked my interest.
The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie.

What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Tazer.

The effects of the Tazer were supposed to be short lived, with
no long term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate
time to retreat to safety....??

WAY TOO COOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home.

I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button.
Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I
pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the
same time, I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth
between the prongs.

AWESOME!!! Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what
that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself
that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, right?
There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently
(trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking
that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving
target.

I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a
second) and then thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But if
I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against
a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised.

Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my
Reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose,
directions in one hand, and Tazer in another. The directions said that a
one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant;
a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major
loss of bodily control; and a three-second burst would purportedly make
your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst
longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.

All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about
5" long, less than 3/4 of an inch in circumference (loaded with two itsy,
bitsy AAA batteries); pretty cute really, and thinking to myself, 'no
Possible way!'

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best.

I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked
to one side so as to say, 'Don't do it stupid, 'reasoning that a one
second burst from such a tiny lil ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.
I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it.

I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button,
and... HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION. WHAT THE...!!!

I'm pretty sure Hulk Hogan ran in through the side door, picked
me up in the recliner, and body slammed us both on the carpet, over
and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in
the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both
nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm
tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs!
The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging
to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an
attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the
living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a Tazer,
one note of caution: there is NO such thing as a one second burst
when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it
is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the
floor! A three second burst would be considered conservative! A
minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at
that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and
surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of
the fireplace. The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or
so from where it originally sat. My triceps, right thigh and
both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot
up with Novocain and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I had no control
over the drooling.

Apparently I had crapped in my shorts, but was too numb to know
for sure, and my sense of smell was gone. I saw a faint smoke cloud
above my head, which I believe came from my hair.

I'm still looking for my testicles and I'm offering a
significant reward for their safe return!

PS: My wife can't stop laughing about my experience, loved the
gift and now regularly threatens me with it!

I was thinking the same thing. We need some excitement back in here

what's the difference between "your" and "you're"?

thank you.

your is a possessive noun, i.e your socks smell, where is your car?
you're is abbreviation of you are, i.e you're an idiot, you're a good student

I'm glad you wasn't my teacher. "Your" is actually a possessive pronoun!

If I was i'm glad to see you're putting your education to good use.
Another example of you're and your.

"you wasn't "

If you people are screwing around and saying such things just to confuse real students of English, I just have to say, that's not very nice.

It's "you weren't".. geez!

*wurn't

where's your Dictionary ? GET IT RIGHT... "WEREN'T"

Try looking-up irony in your own dictionary!

Don't have to , I went to school

Wow.

I'm afraid Ezy in correct, the abbreviation for "were not"is spelt "weren't" congrats Ezy, :-)

put your education to good use ( English student) not on a porn site

define nice

Stop Online Piracy Act

If someone posted a link here to copyrighted material then in worse case form they could shut down the site while the copyright infringement was investigated. The problem with the law as written is that instead of only covering those sites that blatantly sell copyrighted material in a illegal manner they left it wide open to be applied to even the most innocent cases.

Start Orgasming Please Anybody? :--)

SOPA is an act designed, ostensibly, to thwart online piracy by enabling intellectual rights holders (eg. the music, motion picture, publishing, and software industries) to get websites turned "off" without any due process of the law.