General Forum
catch of the day
One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")
You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
\"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left. :--)
Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")
You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
\"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left. :--)
hope you had a great holiday
i am kind of lonely this holiday by myself and away from family and friends. is anyone else like that and what do you do to make yourself get through it. thanks
Missing Out
I have smelly feet, bad breath, BO and I'm rude and disrespectuful. I've been looking at profiles and I'm finding it really hard to find a host that wants to talk to me.
Is there a girl out there who will still love me? :(
Is there a girl out there who will still love me? :(
RE: Missing Out
i think u just described the man of my dreams
if ur in ur 60s and have some serious illness i could marry u tomorrow even!!!
if ur in ur 60s and have some serious illness i could marry u tomorrow even!!!
RE: Missing Out
I am not 60 but I have a serious illness. Also, I have BO because no one wants to bathe me.
Will you marry me tomorrow?
I really need a good body scrub.
Will you marry me tomorrow?
I really need a good body scrub.
RE: Missing Out
hahaha...i will....and i will teach u to take care of yourself...Kiss
Air pump up bra
Any girls here who has an air pump up bra? The pads of the bra are like small balloons which can be pumped up to make your boobs look bigger.
RE: Air pump up bra
look for Gossard Airotic ultrabra. Has pump you carry in purse in case you need to add air. If only could add helium! That would be best uplift!
RE: Air pump up bra
...to look down front and see something pumped up... and understand better the risk of a burning cigarette...
RE: Air pump up bra
burning cigarette ashes could burn hole in air pumped bra, then deflated (bra and ego) left with one side bigger than other!
RE: Air pump up bra
Unfortunately this bra has been out of production for around a couple of years now, why don't you contact Gossard directly and ask them about it and see if they have any plans to reintroduce this product.
RE: HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!
Happy New Year, Happy New Year, May we all.....HAVEEEE a vision now and then, of the world where every neighbour is a frie-ee-yeah--eend
pope v president
The Pope goes to New York. He is picked up at the airport by a limousine. He looks at the beautiful car and says to the driver, "You know, I hardly ever get to drive. Would you please let me?"
The driver is understandably hesistant and says, "I'm sorry, but I don't think I'm supposed to do that."
But the pope persists, "Please?"
The driver finally gives in. So the pope takes the wheel, and boy is he a speed demon! He hits the gas and goes nearly 100 in a 45 zone. A young policeman notices and pulls him over. The cop walks up and asks the pope to roll down the window. Startled and surprised, the young officer asks the pope to wait a minute. He goes back to his patrol car and radios the chief.
Cop: "Chief, I have a problem."
Chief: "What sort of problem?"
Cop: "Well, you see, I pulled over this guy for driving way over the speed limit but it's someone really important."
Chief: "Important like the mayor?"
Cop: "No, no, much more important than that."
Chief: "Important like the governor?"
Cop: "Muuuuch more important than that."
Chief: "Like the President?"
Cop: "I don't know, maybe more."
Chief: "Who's more important than the President?"
Cop: "I don't know, Sir, but he's got the pope DRIVING for him!" :--)
The driver is understandably hesistant and says, "I'm sorry, but I don't think I'm supposed to do that."
But the pope persists, "Please?"
The driver finally gives in. So the pope takes the wheel, and boy is he a speed demon! He hits the gas and goes nearly 100 in a 45 zone. A young policeman notices and pulls him over. The cop walks up and asks the pope to roll down the window. Startled and surprised, the young officer asks the pope to wait a minute. He goes back to his patrol car and radios the chief.
Cop: "Chief, I have a problem."
Chief: "What sort of problem?"
Cop: "Well, you see, I pulled over this guy for driving way over the speed limit but it's someone really important."
Chief: "Important like the mayor?"
Cop: "No, no, much more important than that."
Chief: "Important like the governor?"
Cop: "Muuuuch more important than that."
Chief: "Like the President?"
Cop: "I don't know, maybe more."
Chief: "Who's more important than the President?"
Cop: "I don't know, Sir, but he's got the pope DRIVING for him!" :--)
Why CC is better than a girlfriend on Christmas!
1. I can spend $100 today and still save money vs a present for a gf
2. I don't have to travel long way to see gf family
3. Don't have to be nice to gf's stupid parents or brother
4. I can watch sports on TV all day
5. I can eat my own crappy cooking instead of someone else's
6. If I get a little drunk and it takes too long to finish, CC girls don't get annoyed...in fact they LOVE it.
2. I don't have to travel long way to see gf family
3. Don't have to be nice to gf's stupid parents or brother
4. I can watch sports on TV all day
5. I can eat my own crappy cooking instead of someone else's
6. If I get a little drunk and it takes too long to finish, CC girls don't get annoyed...in fact they LOVE it.
RE: xmas plans
i actually organised myself,so i didn't have to spend christmas with my family.my thinking being that why,on the most festive of days,should those closest to me be punished by having to look at my sorry ass all day.it was the best(& cheapest)gift i could give them.so if you are all good blues & oranges next year,maybe i might leave you alone for Christmas 2009!! :--)
A christmas drink was had by
Ally and Wayne wanted to go out drinking for christmas,but they only had 2 pounds between them. Ally said, "Hang on, I have an idea."
He went next door to the butcher's shop and spent the 2 pounds on one large sausage. Wayne said, "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!" Ally replied, "Don't worry - just follow me."
They went into the pub where Ally immediately ordered two double shots of Jack Daniels. Waybe said, "Now you've lost it! Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money to pay for this!" Ally replied, with a smile," Don't worry - I have a plan. Cheers!" They downed their drinks. Ally said "OK! I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you get on your knees and put it in your mouth." Said and done,the barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.
They continued this, bar after bar, getting more and more drunk, all for free. At the tenth bar, Wayne said, "Ally - I don't think I can do this anymore. My mouth is sore and my knees are killing me!"
Ally said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage at the third bar!"
Wishing that everyone had/has a joyous Christmas with those dearest to them :--)
He went next door to the butcher's shop and spent the 2 pounds on one large sausage. Wayne said, "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!" Ally replied, "Don't worry - just follow me."
They went into the pub where Ally immediately ordered two double shots of Jack Daniels. Waybe said, "Now you've lost it! Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money to pay for this!" Ally replied, with a smile," Don't worry - I have a plan. Cheers!" They downed their drinks. Ally said "OK! I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you get on your knees and put it in your mouth." Said and done,the barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.
They continued this, bar after bar, getting more and more drunk, all for free. At the tenth bar, Wayne said, "Ally - I don't think I can do this anymore. My mouth is sore and my knees are killing me!"
Ally said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage at the third bar!"
Wishing that everyone had/has a joyous Christmas with those dearest to them :--)
Merry Christmas
It has been over 6 weeks since I have been on CC. A record for me. I have been addicted for over 5 years. I am on my way to recovery. But I wanted to say Merry Christmas to the many friends I have made here....BonBon, Triksy, Heidi and my beloved Monika. I will try and come back in a few months. Not that you care ...but I am always thinking of you.
RE: Merry Christmas
Wb BB))) See ya soon))) Ah and merry xmas to u too)) May all ur wishes come true))))):*
RE: Merry Christmas
not sure about his wishes but being christmas,any chance of you being in a red,short,tight outfit with white trimmings tonight monika?
RE: Merry Christmas
Welcome back.. I think Triksy, Heidi and your beloved Monika are no more here..
Merry Christmas
I am in st.pete flotida for the holidays but its kinda a bummer cuz I have a bunch of work to catch up on so I have really gotten to relax
Ho ho ho!
Jaysus how ya all. Merry Xmas!
Just bumped into this site seems like great fun indeed. Strangely I can't seem get into textchat - get message guests arent allowed. Can you actually chat for free on this site?
Looking for some nice BBW girl with natural hairy gee and armpits. Cheers all!
Just bumped into this site seems like great fun indeed. Strangely I can't seem get into textchat - get message guests arent allowed. Can you actually chat for free on this site?
Looking for some nice BBW girl with natural hairy gee and armpits. Cheers all!
do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
RE: do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
i got 2 x-mas cards, some photos and one pair of panties.
RE: do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
You A host or member ? And what is in them ? And from who ?
RE: do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
One host bought me a pink sheep I must just go fetch it she is using it in the meantime P
RE: do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
You cant be serious ha ha i must meet this host is she in fetish ?
RE: do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
BUT people must know that host's give too ))) I had to tell how kind host is ))
RE: do u get any gift for christmas from ane memnber or host?
I got a nice box of chocolates from a host. A nice free private vid from another. And a perfume from another host and 4 x-mas cards from other hosts. I can't complain. They love me.... or my credit card :-P
Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas to everyone ... and hoping that 2009 will be a successful year for all.
The best way to get ready for Christmas night
So we start first with a hot bath, let's say in the Jacuzzi or could be a hot tub as well with smelling salts to help you relaxing and get away the tension from your body. Feel the benefit of the warm water all over your body and the help of aroma salts chosen carefully to easy your respiration and chest pain.
Then I will dry you up with a warmed towel and laying on the bed face down and the warm towel covering your shoulders and back. I start slowly massage your feet and legs with warm massage oil and warm soft hands, with slow long smooth moves. Of course the massage oil is warmed a little so you can relax even more when I touch you all over with smooth soft warm hands and long fingers in slow long moves up and down all over your body.
I start with the feet because there are the most important spots communicating with all vital organs and spots from your body so I massage carefully the soles, the toes one by one, the heels then softly going up to ankles.
To be continued in video chat....
Kisses, Julia
Then I will dry you up with a warmed towel and laying on the bed face down and the warm towel covering your shoulders and back. I start slowly massage your feet and legs with warm massage oil and warm soft hands, with slow long smooth moves. Of course the massage oil is warmed a little so you can relax even more when I touch you all over with smooth soft warm hands and long fingers in slow long moves up and down all over your body.
I start with the feet because there are the most important spots communicating with all vital organs and spots from your body so I massage carefully the soles, the toes one by one, the heels then softly going up to ankles.
To be continued in video chat....
Kisses, Julia
Happy new year to all of U
Weli that old sun of ours has proved she made once again,
so happy New Year to all of U and Merry X-mas ( God Jul ) to those who believe or tto hose who simply just want a parrty -
urs 4 fun too.
so happy New Year to all of U and Merry X-mas ( God Jul ) to those who believe or tto hose who simply just want a parrty -
urs 4 fun too.
RE: HAPPY HOLIDAYS PPL
merry christmas Cristal, many blessings, love, joy and happenesse to you
Happy Birthday to Me :)
Its my birthday today :)))))))))))))))))))
Happy birthday to anyone else who has their birthday today :)
and yes that is my real id :)
Happy birthday to anyone else who has their birthday today :)
and yes that is my real id :)
RE: Happy Birthday to Me :)
happy birthday dear and everything u wish to come true...Kiss
RE: hi everyone
Thx and also congratulations to all the winners. I agree it was very fun to guess the words, little bit diffecult from time to time but fun as hell and it drove me crazy sometimes...but me and all the hosts I saw always got the words.